Good Sex Tips Like Gourmet Food
Couples wanting good sex should think of sex like they think of food says Sydney sex coach Jacqueline Hellyer who reckons too many Australians settle for baked beans when they could be enjoying Fillet Mignon.
And Hellyer – who is the “sexpert” for Men’s Health and Women’s Health magazines – says the best sex tip you can follow is that just like preparing a nice meal needs time to prepare the ingredients, space to savour the food, and to relax after the meal, so good sex requires planning.
Even in your early dating days great sex wasn’t really “just spontaneous” – you made an effort to look nice, you shaved your legs, and wore nice underwear – so for couples who’ve been together a while, good sex needs the same commitment as a cooking a gourmet meal.
Good Sex Tip No 1 – Good Connection
Prime your intimacy levels with small gestures of affection and caring during the day. Ensure you have regular companionship time. Go for walks, take a bubble bath together, take an interest in each other’s leisure interests. Make time every day for quality chill out and unload time.
Good Sex Tip No 2 – Make Time For Sex
Not as simple as it sounds… Find the best time for both of you – and Hellyer suggests the standard “last thing at night” when you’re both frayed from the day’s demands may not be the best time. Talk it over and agree on what works for you. Is it a lazy weekend sleep in while the kids watch TV, or simply making a commitment to go to bed early and have “sex before dinner.” The secret is to plan for sex, and not rely on it “just happening.”
Good Sex Tip No 3 – Create Romance Space
Just as you need to allocate time, it’s a great idea to create safe and sensual space for sex. Feng Shui your bedroom for great sex! Dump the TV and de-clutter the clothes and magazines on the bedroom chair. Get rid of the exercise equipment and don’t allow your bedroom to double as an office. This is a romantic space where you can relax and not be distracted by daily pressures.
Good Sex Tip No 4 – The Right Equipment
A comfortable bed and clean linen is a given. Plenty of cushions, a luxurious throw, soft lighting, good music, light perfume or air freshener, all help set the mood. Have on hand something to assist with lubrication, like Ignite Intimate gel, or massage oil if it takes your fancy. And then there are the “extras” like vibrators or dildos, lingerie or dress ups or other toys that might take your erotic fancy. Allow yourself to play – as Hellyer says “Sex is playtime for grown ups.”
Good Sex Tip No 5 – Right Attitude
Having sex under sufferance is not good for relationships long term. Sydney sex therapist Dr Rosie King describes this kind of sex as “mercy sex” – a soulless experience that leaves both partners feeling bad. It provides a quick fix for the high sex drive partner but solves nothing in the relationship in the long run. The one giving mercy sex feels used and derives no pleasure, while the one receiving feels disappointed and just as unfulfilled as before (Where Did My Libido Go – The Impact of Desire Discrepancy, Random House).
If you are in this cycle, take steps to break it, even if it requires counselling. Get rid of thinking of sex as duty, or performance, or about doing things to another person.
As marriage and relationships advisor Ian Grant suggests in Growing Great Marriages, invest in the relationship, operate a Love Bank, and dispense praise like spring rain.
Herbal Ignite for Good Sex
Another great sex tip is trying time-tested herbal sex drive boosters. Herbal Ignite produces a range of men’s and women’s sexual health products, which have helped countless couples restore the spark to their love lives over the last fifteen years.
Herbal sexual health products like Herbal Ignite bring multiple benefits, such as an enhanced sense of wellbeing and improved energy levels, as well as heightened sexual response. Now there’s a great sex tip for you! Discover the Ignite difference for yourself today.